Launchables - Hoodie
🚀 Launchables™ — Naturally Flavored Chaos
Forget snack time. It’s blast time.
Straight from the Chief Larper™ arsenal comes Launchables™, the nutritionally questionable, battlefield-approved parody of your childhood favorite — now packed with 40MM of pure simulated thunder.
Inside this tasty tray of tactical treats:
- 🫗 7x 40MM HE "snack pods" — High-Explosive, High-Energy, Zero Calories
- 🔵 1x Blue Inert Round — For those with dietary restrictions
- âś… Naturally flavored (by diesel fumes, regret, and cordite)
Perfect for:
- 🧢 Flexing at the field
- 📦 Tactical lunchbox art
- đź’Ą Causing confusion at PTA meetings
“I used to eat Lunchables… now I deploy Launchables.”
— Chief Larper, probably mid-breach.
⚠️ Not edible. Not functional. Extremely operational in spirit.
100% morale-boosting merch.
đźš« Not affiliated with Kraft or anyone sane.
More details
- 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester
- Charcoal Heather is 60% ring-spun cotton, 40% polyester
- Carbon Grey is 55% ring-spun cotton, 45% polyester
- Heavyweight fabric (8.5 oz)
- Regular fit but can run a bit tight
- Unisex sizing
EU GPSR Product Information:
- Manufacturer contact information
- Name: Chief Larper
- Email: contact@support.larper.army
- Postal address: PO Box 5696 Santa Monica, CA 90405
- Additional information: Additional information: This product is made for adults. Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, bisphenols and phthalates level requirements. 2 year warranty in EEA and UK, established by Directive 1999/44/EC.
Size & Fit
Quality Guarantee & Returns
- Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
- Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.
Launchables - Hoodie Size Guide
| Size label | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
|
S
|
27
|
20
|
|
M
|
28
|
21
|
|
L
|
29
|
23
|
|
XL
|
30
|
25
|
|
2XL
|
31
|
26
|
|
3XL
|
32
|
28
|